Just Give the Kid Some Bacon
So I was in Key Food on Court Street, torturing myself with sub-standard produce and refrigerated items of questionable freshness, when I hear this shrill young voice cutting through the Muzak din. "I want bacon. I want bacon. I want bacon. I want bacon." Lo and behold in the meat section, a young boy (perhaps 6 or 7 years old) is swinging around a support poll pole chanting the very phrase I was thinking when I woke up on January 1. His mother, with a full cart (how does this happen in this abominable grocery store?), is rooting through the frozen not-meat section of the grocery.
"Honey, you are not having any bacon."
But he would hear none of it. "I want bacon, I want bacon, I want bacon," comes the refrain.
"No, you are not getting any bacon," the exasperated 30-something mom retorts.
"But you're always saying I'm so pale and skinny. Bacon would help me get fat. I need bacon." Again, his mom gives a flat no.
"Why? Is it because you are a vegetarian?" he says.
"Yes, your father will get you some bacon later."
"I don't want that fake bacon. It tastes gross," he says.
"But you always say you like it," says an increasingly frustrated mom.
"That's because you tell me I can't criticize your cooking."
"Well, you're not getting any bacon."
Pause for a minute while the boy continues to spin around the poll pole in the meat department.
"Ewe, this turkey has blood on it," the boy calls out to him mom.
"And that's why we don't eat bacon," she says, finally sensing victory.
"Nope, bacon doesn't have blood. I want bacon."
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I can't stand that store and avoid going in at all costs, even though it's right around the corner from where I live. That place is disgusting and I get nauseous from that rotten meat smell whenever I go in there.
*pole
heard that the key food store will soon be closed for a major renovation. everything needs to be revamped which should include a major shake-up in management.
You mean... no more store manager with a blood stained white coat?
After watching Tim Burton's version of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, I can only imagine this kid will go on to build the worlds biggest and best bacon factory the world has ever seen.
When people talk about the store manager with the blood stained white coat, are they talking about the older bald one who stands by the cigarette counter and says nothing, or the younger one who stands by the cigarette counter and pretends to sexually harrass the cashiers? Because there's a difference, y'know.
Give the kid some meat for God's sake. Strict vegitarianism is bad for children, case closed. I had a friend in high school who was raised in such a family. She decided to eat meat in Junior year and grew an inch in 4 months.
And dont forget the couple who got charged for child endangerment last year for some freakish diet they wewre forcing their child to eat. (OK- probably more than the fact that they wanted to feed the kid seeds all day- but close).
But worst of all- she took her kid to Key Food?
I'm not sure.. if it's the younger or older one. Does the Key Food on court require all male employees to wear blood stained coats?
tom-i think dennis is referring to the older, bald one who is totally inept. he represents everything that key food court street is which is why i don't buy anything but sodas from that store.
You can always try our side of Jubilat Bacon (silly and rather shameless self promotion...) 4 very tasty pieces of polish slab bacon.. It's smoked, boiled, brought to schnack sliced and grilled!
i heard that smell is from a backed up plumbing system. it's sewage.
My mother's brother's cousin said you shouldn't base an argument on secondhand (or fourthand) anedotes. A nutritionist will tell you that vegetarianism is fine for any and all healthy people. There is some debate about the neccessity of omega acids found only in fish, but I'll risk that given the overwhelmingly negative documented science that shows that meat-oriented diets causes heart disease.
ugh, please excuse my poor verb agreement. It is not caused by meat deficiencies.
I've known a few people that tried to go vegetarian without success... usually because they eat too many carbohydrates, not enough greens, or they forget about protein completely. I eat much less meat than I used to, but I don't think I would ever be able to go completely vegetarian.
A vegetarian definitely has to like vegetables, but unless you're aiming for vegan protein is hard to miss.
That Key Food is roughly akin to a prison commissary. Every time I go in there, I feel like someone's going to shiv me for my smokes. And I'm talking staff, not customers.
this literally made me laugh out loud - who is this woman to deny her child pork products?