Bitch Session: Key Foods on Court Street
Maybe it's the couple of beers I just had at the White Horse Tavern. Maybe it's the elation of finally seeing the Daily Show taped live. Whatever it is, I've finally got enough courage to say what everyone in the neighborhood must already be thinking: Key Foods on Court Street and 2nd Place S-U-C-K-S. For one, it smells like fresh poop or not-so-fresh dead meat at all times. I try to look at the smell as a strange gift from God, as it stops me from purchasing too much food, which half the time is stale or bad or both. Its produce is a joke--not even the onions can be trusted to be edible. Looking for something special, such as an herb other than parsley or cilantro? No such luck. Interested in tortilla chips that don't fall limply from your fingers? Wrong store. I could go on. What I don't get is that there are tons of people in the neighborhood who eat. Most of them seem like sensible shoppers. Please someone open up a grocery store on our side of the 'hood that doesn't smell and that carries fresh inventory! (One small caveat, the small natural foods stand on Court just below 2nd Place is the more pure gift from the Almighty. I don't know what I'd do without it.)
Fun Facts:
According to this website, the Key Foods was once a theater.
In a mostly unrelated note, I've always enjoyed this story about a monkey in a Manhattan Key Foods.
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i give it points for stocking diet rite soda, but otherwise it's a lost cause. it doesn't even have a decent brand of cat food.
but i think in this neighborhood, many of us are old fashioned & buy our meats from Esposito, fish from Fish Tales and cheese from the Sahadi (or Tuller if you're rich). all we need places like this for are staples. and they have those, but they're not inspiring. we could definitely use a good produce place at this end of the 'hood.
pathmark over on 2nd Ave is a pretty good store if you could only figure out a time to go when there aren't a million other customers. i like 8am Saturday, personally.
Yeah, we tend do Key Foods because it's close. When I need something like fresh buttermilk I tend to go out of my way to get it.
Key Foods sold us spoiled buttermilk on 2 occasions. I learned my lesson.
I love Caputo's for meat, cheese and olives. And the veggies at the place on Atlantic (next to Sahadi's) is great. I just wish it wasn't so far away. I needed lemongrass for a recipe the other day, and that would have meant trekking almost 20 blocks (thankfully we talked out friends with a car into doing it for us).
When I was 2 months pregnant I realized I could no longer step inside the KeyFood because of the awful smell. I had always tried to tell myself that it was the cleaner they used but I fear it was something worse as you suggest. I do the majority of my shopping elsewhere but in a pinch will go there for seltzer or a can of beans... otherwise no fresh food ever!
I think all key foods smell bad. I have been in several that smell like a dirty cat litter box. yuck. and there are always fruit flies swarming over the produce. Disgusting.
they key foods on 7th ave and carroll in park slope is the same way. there was a sewage "issue" there about 2 years ago, and it has smelled *strongly* of shit almost every time i have been in there since. fortunately, i live closer to the c-town now. in addition to the awful smell, the staff was always incredibly rude and inept. so glad i don't have to go there anymore.
-glitch p-udding
http://linkfilter.net
A lot of people in the neighborhood do indeed eat. Many of them get their food from FreshDirect, which you should be doing as well. Their seafood is better than just about any market in the hood, and the breads rule too.
If not, well ... as far as meats are concerned, Staubitz on Court and Los Paisanos on Smith should have you covered, butcher-wise, and that produce stand on Court near Wyckoff is a big winner too. For essentials and last minute needs, it's a lot easier to just go to the Met on Smith than deal with that Key Foods.
I have to say, I struck up a relationship with one of the checkout girls (the cute one who's recently been promoted, apparently, to the cigarrette desk and given the duty of bossing the other morose ones around) and seeing her bright smiling face always made my shopping experience a pleasant one, especially when she was snapping at everyone else, employees and customers alike.
Plus, you can't beat 2 for $5 Entenmann's cakes.
Time to get on that FreshDirect train...fresher, friendlier and cheaper than the Key Foods on Smith Street...
This store makes me completely insane on so many levels. I was so bursting at the seams that I wrote about it a month or so ago, and am glad to see I'm not alone in my Key Foods loathing.
http://www.scaredycatstalker.com/storereviews.html#keyfoods
We do Fresh Direct sometimes. There are occasions where we forget to make our order or I have a spontaneous need to make something... Those Key Foods girls amaze me how they can do a complete transaction without noting your presence.
I left the neighborhood almost three years ago, but I could still place the foul smell you described IMMEDIATELY. I used to hold my nose as I walked through the back of the store. Such a pleasant way to shop for food...
Ugh. That store makes me sick. I picked up a box of cereal the other day and it was damp and had some mold on it. Above it, the ceiling had a huge nasty hole with water dripping and wires hanging out. It seems to me that stuff like large gaping holes that expose dripping pipes and other contaminants should be a Health Code violation...
I try to save my shopping for the weekend and go to the Pathmark.
Yeah, we don't call it Key Food anymore, we call it "Something Has Died."
Fresh Direct is not for everyone. I don't like to be home when they tell me to, nor do I like having to decide what to eat for a whole week at a time. I buy fresh ingredients on my way home from work. When I buy for a week, I wind up making plans every night and it all goes bad. Pls FD doesn't have enough variety in the general grocery categories. one kind of diet soda or feminine products or cat litter is just not enough.
afrosam, i'm so impressed you managed to crack one of those key food cash register girls. dennis is right - they can hardly be bothered to note your presence. i feel bad for them in the winter all bundled up in their puffy parkas trying to look cool and stay warm at the same time. i'll have to go to the cigarette counter to shop from now on.
and what's up with the credit card system @ key foods? i love how it takes a full minute for the receipt to print, then you have to turn it sideways to fit your signature.
Key Food (no "s") is ghetto. This is hardly news.
Well.. if it's ghetto then it should be Key Foodz
Amusingly, both www.keyfoods.com and www.keyfood.com work, so they acknowledge the common misspelling.
The Fifth Ave. Park Slope location isn't completely hideous (though they inexplicably carry lots of British goods). I wouldn't say the whole chain is ghetto.
The 5th Ave Key Food is probably the best one. The one on 7th avenue - that you might think would be nicer - is a total shithole with the most pea-brained f*cking morons at the cash register. I've been there enough times to know what I'm talking about - all praise Union Market.
I alternate shopping at the Montague St, Atlantic Ave, and Prospect Ave (Windsor Terrace) Key Food stores. They are not as bad as the Court St and 7th Ave locations. No smells that I can recall, and the cashier even smiled once.
A smile? Shocking!
Garden of Eden on Montague St. is pretty good.. We bought our organic Turkey there for Thanksgiving.. Best tasting bird I've had. It's too far to be a regular shopping location.
Forget FreshDirect; join the Park Slope Food Co-op. If a check-out person is surly to you, you'll have the chance to be surly back every four weeks.
The windsor terrace one is actually ok..
i would trade the world in for having that Key Food back as i now live closer to the MET on Smith St which reeks so violently of vomit its hard to stay in there for more than 5 minutes.
oh and the maggots in the produce. on more than one occasion.
The staff and the rude manager (the balding guy who's always in a white coat ) have to learn customer service basics. I have now stopped saying thanks to the cashiers after paying since I have always been greeted with silence in the past. Their staples are horribly expensive. Grated parmesan which averages $3.75-$3.95 sells for $5.95 in this store. Butter and processed cheeses are also exorbitantly priced.
what's the latest scoop on the arrival of whole foods and/or trader joe's?
According to Whole Food's web site http://www.wholefoodsmarket.com/stores/newstores.html, the Park Slope Whole Foods is going to be at 220 3rd Street, and it's going to cover 52,000 square feet. I haven't heard anything definite about Trader Joe's.
The Key Food on Court St. is not a Key Foods -- it's an imposter... it's a fake Key Foods. It is actually just a shitty super market, but the people who run it put up a fake Key Food sign... I called Key Food headquarters and they said there was no Key Food on Court St. in Carroll Gardens... you gotta check it out... it's a fake!!!!
i knew it had to be fake! who would let sewage drip in the dairy aisle like that? ugh. i always imagine that's why the young gals there are pissy; they leave their shift smelling like poo. i've always suspected the Met on Smith was bogus too. the mgr is a prize. he used to follow me around as if i was a shoplifter. nice. one time a customer came back because he was missing an item he was charged for. a huge fight followed with the mgr, everyone was watching, and when the customer finally left in a big huff (he was a BIG guy) the mgr yelled out the door "fu*k your mother too!" what an idiot.
what a DUMP man you think mohhammad with the whote coat on Court street you k now th e bald manager would ever wash his coat NO LUCK just as he runs the joint he is a walking biohazard like his store BOYCOTT I SAY !!!!!
hey just checked key food web site it seems it is a key food on court after they are listed on the store locator...man wish I could have called them on it by calling the key food company to shut them down what a disgusting place I went to get chicken the other day and all I found was yellow slimy poor excuses of meat balls they called "boneless chicken breast" man who buys that shit
God, I always thought it was only me. They truly suck. Here's some inside dope -- My uncle was a manager at a Key Food years ago -- he told me they would TURN OFF the freezers at night, carry away the drippy ice cream in the morning to be wiped down.
On Court St, I have found post-dated Perdue chicken with the perdue stamped date RUBBED OFF with nail polish remover or equivalent, leaving a yellow highlight where you could still see the date if you looked carefully enough -- several days earlier than the KEY FOOD date that they stamped or stickered on the FRONT of the package (perdue usually has theirs on the back).
They do this around Thanksgiving, when chicken sales are slow.
The scam on sale items is this: When there's a half-price sale, like on cereal, they'll get 1/2 price from their supplier, who hope you will try their product. KF puts a few boxes out, the rest in storage. If you whine they'll give you a raincheck which most people will never claim. When the price goes back up next week, double money for them.
When they have quality meats on sale, watch what they slice for you. Often it is in plain white wrapping -- a cheaper product. I walked out when they tried that with me.
And those cashiers? Holy shit. Some vapid cuties, but looks like owner has a taste for underage long-nailed divas with major Brooklyn attitude. Havent been their in years tho, wouldn't know the latest.
Every year "Frank"? the owner, would close off the street for a day, and shove some cotton candy into the mouths of the wee ones to win over the neighborhood.
Don't know if it still goes down lke that, but please, dont give these sleazoids your money. They are such frauds.
Ironically, and completely incidentally, I'm doing a story on this Key Foods, which does indeed appear to not really be an actual Key Foods of the chain as we know it. Please contact me off the list, and I'd love to interview any single one of you who may want to talk about your experiences there, and what you'd think of what I have heard is the new proposal for development going in its place. jessw@brooklynpapers.com
Wow, um foot in mouth. It IS a real Key Food. But they're a franchise, so it's independently owned.
Yeah, the KF on Grand St. @ Lorimer St. in Williamsburg suffers the same crappy customer service and lack of selection. It sucks. Featuring dusty produce and moldy strawberries. I took a chance a few weeks ago and bought some green organic bananas which I hoped would, in time, be edible but of course they never turned; the skin just stuck to the rotting banana. It’s weird that the same indifferent attitude prevails at these two stores. The only time a cashier acknowledges a customer’s presence is if someone is paying with a bankcard, and gets interrupted, barking NO CASH BACK! Weather or not cash back is wanted. I actually found a decent Key Food on MacGuiness Blvd. and Greenpoint Ave. in Greenpoint. T he cashiers there, however possibly already collecting social security, are almost maternal in their care for the customer. They’re extremely polite and always as if you want cash back. But I still wouldn’t buy produce or meat from them.
Yesterday (12/32/05) was the first time I've been in key food on court and it didn't smell like a cat box. The meat also looked much better... is this a fluke? I still avoid shopping there unless I absolutely have no other choice.
KF on Atlantic @ Clinton is pretty good for staples (although last night they were out of free-range eggs--free the birds!).
Then with the produce stand next door and Sahadi's and the other Arab stores nearby, everything's good.
And in the summer go to the Red Hook farmer's market (with Cloonshee chickens), oh man, it's great!
What a howl reading all of this: I’m glad to know I am not alone about despairing over Brooklyn ‘super’markets. I just moved to Cobble Hill from a whole year in Clinton Hill where things are way worse, baby (and from a land where grocery stores are palaces to gorgeous food before that). The Associated there on Waverly is simply sad :-( (but not as revolting as KF). And happily there is the epicerie du Quartier at Vanderbilt and Dekalb which is cute and French and tasty but small and not so practical unless you can survive on nutella and baguettes for several months (ahem). I was committed to supporting local stores until I realized that I would starve or turn sallow if I had to rely on the Associated for anything other than English muffins (I ended up Fresh Directing). So when I moved to Cobble Hill (Henry Street) I nearly cried - no wait, I did cry -when I went into the Met at Degraw and saw perky produce, windmill cookies, mango juice and seaweed soup packets.It is about the least dreadful grocery experience I’ve had in New York City. Add to that the great shops on Court and Smith and y’all can’t complain.
Maybe there’s more going on at the KF than we dare imagine. Remember Soylent Green?
I walk the half mile to the Met on Smith, and I totally agree with the above commenter -- it's well worth the walk. Their produce is FANTASTIC and SO cheap! Especially their prepackaged stuff. It's like a REAL grocery store, they're open later than that crappy KF (which I live not even a block from but still avoid) -- until 9PM, and THEY DELIVER!
wow u people really have no lives.. i worked there for 4 years and none of the things youve said are true .. and if we have had problems it wasnt on a regular basis! thanks to people like you the elderly in the neighborhood have no where close to shop anymore!
The problems seemed quite persistent to me and plenty of other customers. Yes, it's terrible that someone else didn't take the opportunity to open a better grocery store in the same space. It seems that all you get in this city are really pricey high-end places and crappy joints like that old Key Food.
i agree most key foods are crappy. but the one on flatbush and sterling, thats a store. produce always fresh, and the gourmet items, i think the most variety in brooklyn. the beer selection.... makes me want to drink, and i dont.
Carl's right: Jo, Brian & Joseph's on Flatbush ave btwn Park and Sterling is as good as it gets. Lot's of produce, organic stuff, more types of beer than i've ever seen in a supermarket great cheese and a deli. It's unfortunate that these guys have to share a corporate name with some other key food stores.
try the associated on 5th avenue and union in park slope. it's clean, and nice and not overly expensive (cheaper than the key food on 7th) and the staff is friendly and helpful. i come from all the way across the park to shop there.